I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
