i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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