first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
