does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize