Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
