Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
