I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize