My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
