Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
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