I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I deserve this hangover.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
