Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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