my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
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Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
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bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
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