why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high