i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
