Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
