so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
