Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
