Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
