i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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