Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
