We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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