So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize