I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
So squirting runs in the family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize