so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
