youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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