yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
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I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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