is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
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