I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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