Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
