absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Randomize