Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
