I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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