I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
