is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Randomize
