3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
I should be sponsored by Trojan
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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