Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Randomize