make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
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