We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
why is half of my head shaved?
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
