I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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