do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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