i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
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