Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
