Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Randomize
