Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
There was a lot of him and a little penis
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
