windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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