In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Farmville is her only friend.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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