even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
