haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Randomize