Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
