are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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