Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
You took a bar mat shot.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
