That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize